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Grieving the Matrix

By | Fine Tuning | 2 Comments

In the mist of the morning, I look in the mirror and accept that one of the most deceptive enemies of the ‘Vital Arts Practitioner’ has caught up with me.

 

Age. At the very least, it is now in my field.

 

Silver grey has corroded the once deep brown whiskers on my face which detail the many sleepless nights working in realms I care not to revisit, although my exposure and travel through them has built a strength and knowledge within me that if ever called forward again would guarantee protection and a much softer landing after integration is actualized.

 

I sigh and am shifted into the gentle awareness that the time I am searching to reclaim, which has markedly “slipped away”, is actually chronicled on my chin, in the lines on my face, surrendered in my eyes. I have earned these “mortal” stripes and the compassion, clarity, magic, and wisdom that it brings cannot be traded for any amount of gold.

 

I witness two doves outside ascend harmoniously and land in unison atop a light post, and am reminded of the love in my life, partnerships and the commitment made when choosing this body: to experience, then share the reintegration of love and respect with the longing hearts that seek the blessings that come to those focused in service.

 

Having signed up for this journey, I have gone through quite a stunning process that has thinned the veils and revealed truths that remain less than comfortable for me. These realizations have placed me in precarious situations where clumsy behaviors have left me open to internal deception and parasitic intellects that derive their security from the most potent distortion bought, sold and accepted by the human race which is “fear”.

 

When first I began to open, I was working a somewhat “normal” job fueled by fear anchored firmly in keeping a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and clothes on my back. It makes perfect sense that those concerns would be embedded deep within me as a result of my direct caregivers being raised by souls subjected to war, famine, and rampant disease.

 

This realization forged the capacity to associate as “witness” to my outer experiences which slowly developed the internal compassion to dissolve the program and pattern of fear which was buried deep within my foundation. I knew it had been propagated from generation to generation with little or no real presence to what was “current” in “my” actual life. I was carrying the burden of those “too distracted to be proactive”, caught in the program of yesterday and unable to receive the present of the present.

 

By the age of three, I knew I was different. This awareness was amplified when, fairly early on in my youth, I was branded with the belief system that if I didn’t follow the model set forth for me by my care givers, I would suffer a long painful life. To quote verbatim the words that would insure my failure as a developing youth, “This is not Michael’s world, you cannot do things your way and you will never live up to your full potential, if you do not… (follow the demands we have placed on you with little or no attention given to your design, gifts or desires.”)

 

When I began following a life of loving service, my long lost childhood knowing of sustainable, benevolent magic was reawakened, which by the way, has much more to do with a deep connection to the earth’s cycles and, more than anything else, concentration and focus on peace and prosperity for prolonged periods of time. Some refer to it as meditation.

 

Here is a very loose time line that I have seen duplicated many times over by those who choose to apply themselves to and through The Breath Centers Gestation Package, which I lovingly have coined the “The Adult Hogwarts” of our time.

 

First phase

Dissatisfaction with life path, loosing connection to all relations and finding that those whose advice has been trusted and followed are just as or more lost than we.

 

Second Phase

Realization that the focus on developing a career to provide a better life for our families and us is a major distraction that creates critical separation between our vital internal connection and those we love.

 

Third Phase

Clarity that whatever we choose as a new direction in our lives must serve humanity in a way that we can really get behind and that it must include and secure within it a platform for our creative freedom, humor and continued stimulation. It must also be sustainable, meaning it can support no one else’s dreams but our own and has to serve others with such impact that there is little need for old structures that “normally” accompany building a fulfilling life.

 

Fourth Phase

Choosing a focus of study enveloped in one of the many and varied healing arts and then experiencing doubt and discomfort around the change and objections that accompany ones awakening and separation from mass group consciousness and the ignorance that fuels it. Along with this comes the realization that our ingrained fear around not being able to “make a living” at it is has been unsubstantiated, as we have survived quite nicely albeit a couple bumps which happen regardless in any new life experience.

 

Fifth Phase

After getting some traction and time under our belts as practitioners, we begin to believe deeply in the art, it’s power, and our ability to facilitate it.

 

Sixth Phase

Believing we are actually “the healer” and becoming so full of spirit in the right hemisphere and the etheric, we become quite disconnected from daily “real world” responsibility and sometimes even become critical of the process and the systems that are in place to provide contrast for the change coming in the future.

 

Seventh Phase

The Fall – Spirit can get loud when we are working out of alignment. This is what I call the “Shamanic Spanking” period, where the newly awakening and all high being is thrust back crashing down to earth, be it by loss of loved ones, health crisis, or relationship dissolve. This could be anything that doesn’t mirror the high and holy life experience one has made for themselves while conveniently overlooking their own spiritual bypass and ego as it allows them to check out of their own continued process.

 

Eighth Phase

Consideration of leaving the whole thing behind and returning to the matrix as a result of too much time spent in the esoteric. Becoming somewhat apathetic to the great numbers of those resolute in denial and distraction and the feeling that the dissolve of the savior complex has left one with little to prop themselves up on.

 

Ninth Phase

The Slow but Subtle Return

We have all of the connection to the earth, multiverse, spirit and etheric we could possibly need. We have learned that boundaries and permission are the only way we can survive in the assignment we can now really never back away from. Beginning to take interest in the workings and limited reality within the matrix and involving ourselves in discussion and group mind set at which ever frequency it is holding, knowing very well that this is what we came here for and that including all forms of reality at all levels of awareness is the only way to meet each where it is currently residing. We experience a reflecting back of increased possibilities for higher ways of evolving without judgment, critique, or adding to the very energetics that arrest the development we have committed to accelerate and support.

 

Number 9, the completion of cycles. I am in so much joy I am sometimes uncomfortable with it. It is overwhelming to have all things working together in a way that is abundant yet requires great character and integrity, lest the lesson get tremendously loud. Great gobs of gratitude for the “caregivers” that created the perfect contrast to the discovery of life’s greatest dreams for without their perfect balance of shadow, we would not be basking in such Clear, Sparkling, Benevolent Light.

 

Celebrating grey, it’s a perfect balance between light and dark…(Wink!)

 

For the good…

 

Michael

 

 

 

Exhale Holy Laughter

By | Offerings | No Comments

By Suzy Adra, Level 1 & 2 Graduate

I could begin this post by mentioning the beauty of Ojai and the amazing setting we were in. I could write about each person at the Teacher Training and how they contributed to my learning in ways that were seen and unseen. I could also write about what an amazing teacher Michael is and how grateful I am for his style of teaching and how he ties it all into one coherent whole. I shall choose to write about my own experience, as that is all I really know for sure.

In the training, Michael Brian Baker asked me if I would be okay getting on the massage table to demonstrate a “one on one” session as the rest of the participants watched. I have done breathwork sessions where I become one with the breath, with the music, or blended into nothingness where the breath just takes over, and breathes me. I have also had sessions where I would literally have to get up and go vomit my guts out.

This time with Michaelwas different then anything I had experienced before.

Emergence, Art by Suzy Adra

 

Michael guided me to begin the breath as usual. As I lay there, inhale inhale exhale, inhale inhale exhale…the familiar dry mouth began, my mind calmed down, and my body started the familiar tingle. I felt Michael working energetically. I could not see him because my eyes were closed but I could feel the energies moving in and around me.

Suddenly, this strange rumbling began from deep within my core… “Can this be for real?” I thought to myself…and then… I began to laugh uncontrollably!

“It’s all a cosmic joke”, kept flashing in my mind’s eye, accompanied by the urge to share it, so I said it outloud.

“It’s all a Cosmic joke!”

Seeds Never Ask Why They Grow, Art by Suzy Adra

 

More laughter followed, and the more I laughed, the funnier it got, and I just could not get myself to stop laughing.

I had the best laugh of my life!

As I laughed, I realized the extreme sadness that the laughter carried and I recognized that it was not foreign to me. I have always used laughter to distract myself from every misery. Sarcasm has always been one of my favorite things.

There she was, the wounded warrior laying with all the years of waging war with herself, and had she finally made it to this table. After a lifetime had passed, she finally said the battle had to end,  laughing her guts out at the insanity of it all in front of twelve complete strangers.

I concluded, I will not accept this “self” abuse anymore.

I will not accept it on behalf of all the women who came before me and who will come after me.

I am not sure how long I was laughing, but it seemed that the entire creation was laughing with me.

The World is my Home, Art by Suzy Adra

I began to feel so much gratitude for the intensity of this release, gratitude for Michael for guiding so gently and holding space, for these strangers who were silently sitting and witnessing this healing with all the patience of a caring, nurturing of the attentive mother.

It is true that we all have the power to heal ourselves. Whenever we are ready, whenever it is ok to let go. When we have forgiven ourselves and integrated the reasons for our suffering. Having someone guide us and bear witness is necessary for this healing to occur and it is a privilege both ways.

I have travelled high and low, learned so many modalities, seeking, searching for resolution. I used the breath for so long and even used it in a recent retreat I facilitated, and yet it is beyond me why it took so long to recognize this breath as the gold.

Have you ever wondered why yoga is so powerful? Have you ever wondered why working out and sports are so powerful? Have you ever wondered why when you dance it feels so amazing?

The secret is the breath.

The breath is our direct connection to source.

The breath never lies, it is the healer, it is truth. It is holy.

Inhale… & Exhale Holy Laughter

To attend a Teacher Training with Michael Brian Baker’s The Breath Center, please go to: thebreathcenter.com/gatherings/trainings

This blog has been shortened and edited for content. To see Suzy’s full blog post, please visit her website here. 

Suzy Adra is a student and practitioner of many disciplines and tools: archaeology, archives, fine art, ayurveda, yoga, meditation, breath work, metaphysics, creativity, consciousness, philosophy, energy healing, and trauma release techniques.  Her current focus is on helping individuals access their creative self through several modalities.  She believes, that for this to happen, there is a required need to release previously held beliefs about oneself, and the world.  Suzy has studied with Michael Brian Baker’s The Breath Center starting in June 2016, and is a Level 1 & Level 2 Graduate. She is available for sessions at suzy.adra@outlook.com .

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“I used to want to save the world…”

By | Uncategorized | No Comments

Are Humans Inherently Destructive?

From a “spiritual” perspective, the answer to this could come easily. “No, we are part of a greater whole, we are one, we are in the Kali Yuga, we all have our dharmic path,” and even more commonly, “Destructiveness is a part of nature” and “Forgiveness and compassion is the only way to heal the past.”
But what about when the violence is still occurs – sometimes even disturbingly close to home? When it floods the media, and when “disharmony” is what drives many of us to our spiritual practice in the first place?
It leaves this important question sensitive and unanswered.
In the movie Wonder Woman, the lead character is faced with the same age-old dilemma. With all of the violence and hunger for war, it is a challenging, if not a completely overwhelming task, to look away from or find resolution for the suffering humanity has seemingly caused itself. Who is to blame? The Gods? Ourselves?
In a time where pointing fingers is more common than balancing or celebrating polarities, we as a society are stalled with unanswered questions.
The truth is, the rising feminine and Creator does not see things in black and white. It is not always us and them. The demons we see outside ourselves are in many ways amplified versions of the very war we battle within.
In the world of duality, each one of us experiences darkness and light within and around us. And every day, every moment, we have a new opportunity step into highest design and tap into “Universal Current” to bring our songs, books, paintings, and projects to the world for peace and transformation.
This IS the medicine to our unanswered questions. It can inspire us to reassess how we can step more confidently into our fullness, forgive AND STILL move forward in our lives with a sense of excitedness, creativity, and passion. We can take the ideas that pop into our heads for collaborations, music, and art and learn new ways share them with the community. This planet is a gift, and with it comes the responsibility of innovation to protect and amplify its beauty for generations to come.
Do you see it? Your Batman/Wonder Woman light is in the night sky, illuminating the many brilliant ideas streaming through our consciousness during these great times of transition.
So… How to capture and bring these ideas from a meeting over tea to form, function, and sustainability?
Next weekend in Santa Cruz, Michael Brian Baker with be sharing a 3 hour Breathwork immersion, with this as the focal point of the circle.
Topics covered will include…
*Highest and best use of idea flow, before function or form
*Tracking, Logging and Nursing as a channel for highest design
*Heart Based Step design – Birthing the either to substance, organically without force
*Designing your circle of influence to best match each individuals independent genius
No matter what you’re reading at this moment, something is being birthed through you. The way in which you take the reigns and nurture it into a reality is a vast and varied play ground of possibility sometimes daunting by it’s sheer magnitude.
Do not miss this opportunity to tap into “Universal Current” as the teacher to support, define and architect your next Earthly Master Piece!
“I used to want to save the world. To end war and bring peace to mankind. But then, I glimpsed the darkness that lives within their light. I learned that inside every one of them, there will always be both. The choice each must make for themselves – something no hero will ever defeat. I’ve touched the darkness that lives in between the light. Seen the worst of this world, and the best. Seen the terrible things men do to each other in the name of hatred, and the lengths they’ll go to for love. Now I know. Only love can save this world. So I stay. I fight, and I give… for the world I know can be. This is my mission, now. Forever.
Blessed be the Grand Creator through the Individual who Dares to Dream!

Sunday November 12th, 2017

12:30-3:30pm

Santa Cruz CA

For more information & to Sign up:

thebreathcenter.com/gatherings/liveloud

Sponsored by: Bodhi Addiction Treatment and Wellness
Won’t make it to Santa Cruz? Join us in Los Angles Next month for a 5 Hour immersion!
Sunday Dec 17th 2017
Mandala Yoga Center LA
1230pm

Sustaining Ecstasy, by Prem Baba

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Excerpt from Prem Baba’s Book

From Suffering to Joy – The Path of the Heart

Four Keys to Sustaining Ecstasy, Introduction

Question: Yesterday I had one of the most profound experiences of my life. I saw myself dissolved. My body had no limits and all the suffering in me was consumed by love. But when I returned to the world to relate with people, this blissful state dissipated and sadness grabbed ahold of me. How can I maintain the state of ecstasy I experienced?

Prem Baba: It seems that you experienced what Zen masters refer to as satori, or a glimpse of the eternal. Many people experience the eternal without being aware of it. However, if you are attentive and determined, you may use this experience as an arrow pointing towards liberation. Satori is attained by emptying the mind. When you perceive the real being, you are present, and from presence springs truth.
Today we heard some beautiful live devotional music. Some of you sang along and thus co-created music. Creativity, and even the ability to experience beauty, is only possible when the mind is peaceful. If the mind is loaded down with knowledge and thoughts, we can’t create anything new, and we remain numb to beauty. Beauty is an expression of the fresh energy of Being.

“If the mind is loaded down with knowledge and thoughts, we can’t create anything new, and we remain numb to beauty.”

 

When the mind becomes serene we experience a connection with the eternal that reveals beauty. The more intense the experience of Being, the more we are able to see the brilliance and the beauty around us. This experience of heightened beauty is a sign that we are in a state of Unity. We are able to realize Unity because we were never actually disconnected from the eternal.
Everything begins with presence, with quieting the mind. This is the foundation of the practice. It’s from silence that truth is born. But to abide in this silence we must understand that compulsive thinking is a disease that we need to treat. Western culture conditions us to think compulsively, so that we lose our connection with beauty and truth. We may look at a beautiful view of the countryside without really seeing it, and we may hear music but not really listen to it – because our minds are busy classifying, labeling, evaluating, and interpreting all that we see or hear. The most we ever do is mechanically interpret what the sense have registered: “How pretty!” But in truth we still aren’t listening or seeing because for that to occur we need to be empty, we need a serene mind.
The mind can become so agitated that we no longer perceive our connection to the divine presence. When the mind is agitated, it prevents us from perceiving beauty. It blinds us to our own beauty and so keeps us from creating beauty. The agitated mind will produce more agitation, be it in the form of art, music, or any other means of expression. All the ugliness we see in the world is a result of this agitation. Fear, hatred, suffering, and people’s stubborn insistence on having everything their way – all of these are automatic reactions caused by the agitated mind.

“The agitated mind will produce more agitation, be it in the form of art, music, or any other means of expression. All the ugliness we see in the world is a result of this agitation.”

On the contrary, true action emerges from the heart. Heart is another name for presence, for serenity. The heart is Being. When the mind is serene, you perceive Being. You see that you are connected to everything, and that the body is but a small aspect of reality. You are life itself, and the first quality of life is love. What is the nature of a flower? It’s to perfume and be beautiful. And what moves this flower to exude perfume and beauty? It is love, because love moves all of existence. Love is the essence of life.
When we get a glimpse of the eternal, we feel this love. We are engulfed in love. Naturally, we want to hold on to this feeling, and so we try to get love from others. In the process, we lose sight of our true nature, which is love itself. Maintaining presence when relating with one another is the human race’s greatest challenge. Mental agitation and, at a deeper level, your imprints and sanskaras (the latent mental and karmic tendencies that shape your current life) prevent you from sharing your love with others.
The experience of the eternal will dissolve these imprints. Little by little you will be freed from selfishness, the master thief of consciousness. The freedom to be yourself and to love selflessly will help you sustain this enlightened state.

“The experience of the eternal will dissolve these imprints.”

If you want to experience unity and sustain the ecstasy you have tasted, it may help you to think of your inner path as a series of phases through which you transition, on after another.
Sri Prem Baba is a master teacher in the Sachcha spiritual lineage of northern India. Born and raised in Brazil, Prem Baba worked as a humanistic psychologist, yoga teacher, and shaman before his arrival in India. Prem Baba offers a method of self-discovery he calls “The Path of the Heart,” which bridges psychology and spirituality, East & West. Through self-investigation, the path works towards purifying and integrating the lower self, until one is able to sustain joy. Pre Baba is dedicated to helping people become channels of divine love by sharing their talents and gifts with the world and thus fulfilling their true purpose in life.